Technorati Tags: Divorce For Men, Divorce Man, Divorce Men, Men For Divorce

Bryan Parker Talks about what one should do after breaking up up with a boyfriend. Bryan Parker was born in Philadelphia Mississippi but currently lives in the City of Compton California [since the age of two]. He attended Emerson Elementary, Roosevelt Middle and Dominguez High Schools in Compton. He has obtained a Certificate of Completion in Child Development Teacher Private License Preschool-Bilingual/Bicultural Education (Los Angeles Southwest College); Certificate of Achievement in Recreation Leadership and an ociates in Science Degree with High Honor in General Education (Compton Community College & El Camino College[Dean's List]); double majored with Bachelor of Arts Degrees in Psychology and Recreation & Leisure Studies - General Recreation Administration (California State University, Dominguez Hills) and is currently studying Marital and Family Therapy. Psychology, Sociology, Marital and Family Therapy, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Abnormal Psychology, Gender, agape, Androgyny, Arranged Marriage, ortive Mating, Attachment Therapy, Baby Boom, Binuclear Family, co-parenting, cohabitation, Commitment, intimacy, Commune, Consummate Love, Courtly Love, Dependence, Divorce, Mediation, Domestic Partner, Extended Family, Endogamy, Emotions, Habitation, Exogamy, Extended Family, Bishop TD Jakes Potters House Gender, Heterogamy, Households, Minority, Pentecostal, Church of God in Christ Charles Blake, Baptist, Full Gospel Baptist Church, City of Compton, City of Refuge Church Bishop Noel Jones, Relationships, Human Sexuality, California, Sex, Cultural, Race, Ethnicity, Balck, African American, Hispanic, Latino, Stressors, traditional sexism, Love Relationships Marriage Dating Wedding Communication character trust phallicstage discourse love genderbeliefsystem Psychology Sociology Marital Family Therapy marriageandfamilytherapy abnormalpsychology sex lcsw Licensed Social Worker Abnormal Gender Relationships Analstage androgyny bisexual cognitivedevelopment depression ego gay gender heterosexism homophobia sexism id oedipuscomplex oralstage penisenvy rape sexstereotypes sexual bryan parker Psychology, Sociology, Marital and Family Therapy, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Abnormal Psychology, Gender, agape, Androgyny, Arranged Marriage, ortive Mating, Attachment Therapy, Baby Boom, Binuclear Family, co-parenting, cohabitation, Commitment, intimacy, Commune, Consummate Love, Courtly Love, Dependence, Divorce, Mediation, Domestic Partner, Extended Family, Endogamy, Emotions, Habitation, Exogamy, Extended Family, Bishop TD Jakes Potters House Gender, Heterogamy, Households, Minority, Pentecostal, Church of God in Christ Charles Blake, Baptist, Full Gospel Baptist Church, City of Compton, City of Refuge Church Bishop Noel Jones, Relationships, Human Sexuality, California, Sex, Cultural, Race, Ethnicity, Balck, African American, Hispanic, Latino, Stressors, traditional sexism, Love Relationships Marriage Dating Wedding Communication character trust phallicstage discourse love genderbeliefsystem Psychology Sociology Marital Family Therapy marriageandfamilytherapy abnormalpsychology sex lcsw Licensed Social Worker Abnormal Gender Relationships Analstage androgyny bisexual cognitivedevelopment depression ego gay gender heterosexism homophobia sexism id oedipuscomplex oralstage penisenvy rape sexstereotypes sexual bryan parker OPRAH Faye Emerson (1948-60), Arthur Godfrey (1948-61), Arlene Francis (1949-75), Dave Garroway (1949-61,69), Garry Moore (1950-77), Art Linkletter (1950-70), Steve Allen (1950-84), Ernie Kovacs (1951-61), Mike Wallace (1951-), Merv Griffin (1951-86), Edward R. Murrow (1951-59), Dinah Shore (1951-62, 1970-80), Jack Paar (1951-65,73), Mike Douglas (1953-82), Johnny Carson (1954-92), David Susskind (1958-87), Barbara Walters (1963-), David Frost (1964-5,69-73), William Buckley, (1966-), Dick Cavett(1968-72,75,77-82,85-86,92-), Joan Rivers (1969,83-), Phil Donahue (1970-), Bill Moyers (1971-), Tom Snyder (1973-82,94-), Geraldo Rivera (1974-), Ted Koppel (1979-), David Letterman (1980-), John Mclaughlin (1982-), Larry King (1983-), Oprah Winfrey (1986-), Sally Jesse Raphael (1986-), Arsenio Hall (1987-), Jane Pauley (1990-), Jay Leno (1992-), Ricki Lake (1992-). Allen, Steve; Carson, Johnny; Donahue, Phil; Downs, Hugh; Emerson, Faye; Francis, Arlene; Frost, David; Garroway at Large; Godfrey, Arthur; Griffin, Merv; King, Larry; Kovaks, Ernie; Leno, Jay; Letterman, David; Moyers, Bill; Murrow, Edward R.; Paar, Jack; Pauley, Jane; Person to Person; Rivera, Geraldo; Shore, Dinah; Susskind, David; Walters, Barbara; Wallace, Mike; Weaver, Sylvester “Pat”; Winfrey, Oprah

Duration : 0:4:46

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Technorati Tags: Abnormal, abnormalpsychology, advice, african-american, Analstage, androgyny, bisexual, black, break, break-up, character, children, dating, depression, Divorce, Dr, ego, family, fathers, Gender, heterosexism, homophobia, id, kids, lcsw, LicensedSocialWorker, love, Marital, marriageandfamilytherapy, marriagefamily, Oprah, orgasm, parents, penisenvy, phallicstage, Phil, Psychology, rape, rebound, relationship, relationships, sex, sexism, sexstereotypes, sexual, Sociology, therapist, therapy, tips, trust, up, Winfrey

Once upon a time there was a divorce group for men and women that was a small part of a non-profit organization called Second Chance in Fremont, California. It was an extraordinary divorce group because the man who led the group was an extraordinary man. His real name was Skylar Moon. He had a Masters degree in psychology and a Masters degree in education, including post graduate work at the Kempler Institute of Psychology. When Skylar walked into a room, people turned around and stared at him with fascination because he had an immediately commanding presence. He was over six feet tall, he usually wore a leather sports jacket, dress shirt (but no tie) and jeans, and he always wore the same jaunty flat leather cap which partially covered his bald head. He often had a cigarillo either between his lips or held between his fingers as if he was about to smoke it. But he never lit it. Skylar looked like a skinny, bald, clean shaven version of Jimi Hendrix. His remarkable personality had a significant positive impact on everybody who had the good fortune to meet him.

New members of the divorce group were always in various stages of emotional devastation. Skylar was very gracious when he welcomed people into the group and he made them feel comfortable by introducing them to the other members and letting them know that they had just joined a group of new friends. But Skylar was a unique group leader because he fearlessly crossed over the line that the psychological profession has drawn in terms of restricting a therapist’s interaction to non-judgmental and unemotional empathic listening. He practiced a kind of emotional shock therapy that worked time after time. Typically, he would interrupt a regular group member’s sad tale of woe and say, “We’ve all heard this same old story one too many times. You’re like an old record that’s stuck in a groove and repeating the same line over and over again. You’re STUCK. You’re standing in your own bucket of excrement and complaining about how much it stinks. Do you want to know why you don’t get out of that bucket? (not waiting for an answer) It’s because you’re petrified with fear of what’s outside the bucket. You’ve grown accustomed to your own stench and you’re comfortable with it. When are you going to make a decision to change your life?” The usual reaction to his confrontation was stunned silence. People did not know how to react to something like that. But the next time they spoke, they would give Skylar all kinds of reasons why it would be so difficult, if not impossible, for them to resolve their financial, emotional, and legal issues. Skylar would interrupt their defensive maneuvering and say, “Be quiet. Just think about what I’ve told you. I’ll come back to you when you have something positive to say.â?

Men often complained bitterly about the horrible things their spouses were doing to them and about how badly they were being hurt. Skylar would say, “Why does that surprise you? She hates you. She doesn’t even like you. She won’t even walk on the same side of the street with you. You’re acting like a maladjusted child who is clinging to its mother’s leg. I’ll tell you what she is doing to you. She is kicking you, and she is going to continue to kick you harder and harder until you hurt so badly that you stop clinging to her leg and let go of her. Your marriage is OVER. You need to understand that because you will not be able to move on with your life until you do.” Long term group members always told the new members, “Listen to Skylar, he knows what he’s talking about. It took me (x number of years) to figure all this out but I’m very glad that I followed Skylar’s advice.” Skylar told everybody, “The best thing you can do is create a new and better life for yourself. Nobody is going to do that for you. You can never go back. Unless you’re a masochist and you actually enjoy pain, you have no alternative but to go forward. Most of you are going sideways and unfortunately you’re not going to move on with your life until you reach the point where you wake up one morning and say to yourself ‘I can’t stand this pain. I simply cannot go on doing what I’ve been doing for one more day.’ That’s when you will begin to make the changes in your life that you’ve been afraid of making. But here’s the good news. Create a new and better life for yourself and someday you’ll discover that living well is the best revenge.â?

There is a transcendent truth underlying Skylar’s concept that living well is the best revenge, but living well should not have revenge as its primary motive. Living well by enjoying each and every day to the fullest possible extent is one of the important things that life is all about, and that concept requires no justification. However, when your ex finds out that you are living better than you did before you were ejected, the knowledge will usually cause them great discomfort and if you have any residual feelings of anger, you will feel even happier about how well you are doing. Living better than you did before does not necessarily require a lot of money. One way to do it is to move to a nicer location than the one where you lived when you were married. It’s a good idea to move away from a place that contains too many bad memories. Consider moving to the place where your ex always wanted to live, or consider relocating to somewhere you always wanted to live. Treat yourself well. Eat well, Have fun. Make new friends. Enjoy life in every possible way. The information about how well you are living and how much fun you are having will filter back to your ex and you will know it. One last bit of Skylar’s advice is worth mentioning here. He used to tell people “Fake it ’til you make it.” That’s an expression used by Alcoholics Anonymous but it applies to this situation as well because even if things do not work out for you immediately, that’s information your ex does not need to have.

Skylar Moon died in 2004. There are countless people who will never forget this man, and they will also not forget how much they benefited from being in his divorce group. This author is one of those people. He is currently living happily ever after in paradise.

Peter Cross
http://www.articlesbase.com/divorce-articles/living-well-is-the-best-revenge-114452.html

$1.5 million or his kidney back. That’s the strange ultimatum a New York surgeon has given his estranged wife.

Dr Richard Batista donated his kidney to his wife Dawnell in 2001. His attorney claims that she began having an extramarital affair a couple of years after the transplant. She filed for divorce in 2005.

Dr. Batista decided to go public after four years of divorce negotations. He wants the donated kidney back, but will accept $1.5 million in compensation.

Mrs Batista and her attorney had no comment on the suit.

The couple has three children, ages, 8, 11 and 14.

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Technorati Tags: Back, Batista, Divorce, Dr, Kidney, Man, Richard, Wants

I recently divorced and have three kids. I’m a little thick but loosing weight fast do to a health problem I got taken care of. But I do get hit on alot just by the wronge type of man. Where are the good ones. I tried church, the store, I even tried the bar. I’m not looking for a one nighter, but a real relationship. Oh, and if it helps I’m 27.

The best answer…don’t look. Spend your life with your kids and for yourself..when someone WORTHY comes along, you will know.

Make a list of all the things you REFUSE to deal with in a mate, and then all the qualities you want. Base on past experience. Adjust your list as needed but never ever settle for less than everything on the list…be reasonable about it as well…don’t put “millionaire” or “Brad Pitt”

Any man in your life needs to be told about the kids up front…let them be the judge of him as well…you are a package deal…if they don’t like him, then get rid of them. Let them help you make that list.

Go slow…Mr Right is out there but if you hurry it along, you may end up with Mr I THOUGHT you were right…..